of Republicans trying to kill me through healthcare bills that are nothing more than deathcare bills
of feeling like my concerns don’t matter
of worrying the cancer is back
of wondering what I did wrong
of wondering if I’ll see my kids grow up
of not being good enough
of being told “it’s going to be ok” when you don’t know that
of not sleeping
of letting myself down every morning by sleeping through my alarm instead of getting up early and going for a walk
of crying from exhaustion
of feeling I don’t matter
of being my own worst enemy
I’m a wreck wearing a mask, dreading my next check up, terrified of seeing Dr. O because what if the cancer is back even though I don’t feel any different than I did 12 weeks ago? What if the scans show it’s back? What will I do?
I’m a wreck.