breast cancer, life, Uncategorized

It’s not about you

“I can’t believe how selfish you’re being.”

“You hurt my feelings by saying I don’t care about you.”

“Why are you making this so personal?”

“Just agree to disagree. God. It’s not that hard.”

“You’re being so melodramatic.”

“I can’t believe you’re unfollowing and unfriending people.”

“You don’t need to worry. Nothing bad is really going to happen. I mean, even if all your fears come true, it’s not like you’ll actually lose your health insurance.”

“You don’t have cancer. You had cancer.”

“You have no idea how hard you’re making this on me, and you’re being this way on purpose.”

“You don’t care how you’re making me feel.”

These are snippets of things said to me yesterday either to my face, on social media, or through messages.

My feelings are mine. I own them. It’s not about you. It’s about me. If that makes me selfish in your eyes, and while I may have a different definition of selfishness, I guess I’m selfish.

You got what you wanted. Good luck with him and his policies.

Do not expect me to agree, to support, to soothe, or to say “It’s ok.”

Do not expect me to fade into the background. I’ve learned to speak up for myself no matter how uncomfortable it makes you.

As the quote says: “[I’ve] been through hell. So, believe me when I say, fear [me] when [I] look into a fire and smile.”

Don’t tell me you love me or care about me and turn around and marginalize my fears and my experiences.


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